Beyond the Veil, Part 1

I can remember a number of times when I was alive where I thought to myself, "If only I didn't need to sleep every night, imagine how much I could get done." Well, let me just say that there is both truth and falsehood in that thought.

I no longer need sleep, biologically anyway, but I do find myself taking some time nearly every evening to meditate and allow my spirit/mind time to process and catch up with the increased input and demands it is under with a nearly 24 hour a day operation. I am still learning various coping mechanisms to my new existence.

This blog is one such coping mechanism. I started this blog with the idea of helping both myself and my former team mates who had not yet faced the transition that I had. Now though, I find myself using it as a tool to help me come to terms with what has happened, and in at least one case recently, to steel myself to do what needed to be done.

I have found out exactly how important this entire process is in these last few days by actually failing to find the time to make my entries. I have been less focused, more anxious, and even depressed when I have failed to at least make some sort of entry. I don't know how many of you are out there reading this, but just imagining that there are living, breathing people reading my entries has helped me to carry on. This is especially true since I learned from John Red Bear how to let go of my Chakra, should I choose to do so. I taught that skill to Greg and was rewarded by watching him pass from the prison that we had chosen for ourselves. Seeing him pass on to the next world was a revelation, knowing that I too could take that path if I chose to.

But I have a mission now. Drake saw me in the lab when Greg took his final trip away from the Chakra that was going to make him a zombie like me. He may not have been able to see into the spiritworld and know exactly what happened, but he was astute enough to see that something strange and powerful had happened. The bastard seemed to KNOW that Greg's body would never be animated in the same way that mind has been, and ended the process that day, telling the lab staff to place the body in storage and to clean up the equipment.

The bastard didn't say shit to me all week until Friday.

That was quite a surprise however, I reported for work on Friday and found the office closed. I had worked late the previous night helping the Lab Geeks disassemble some of the larger pieces of equipment into more storable components, but I had no clue that they would actually be closing down the whole office.

When I showed up on Friday, the door was locked and the reception area seemed empty. My keycard didn't work on the door, so I 'unlocked' the door in a more traditional way, by putting my fist through the glass and turning the handle from the inside.

As it had appeared from the outside, the reception area was totally cleaned out. I made my way back past the interview rooms towards the Lab, only to find that I had to 'unlock' another door. Again, the lab was cleaned out. All of the equipment was gone, all of the files were gone, the only things left were some generic cleaning supplies and a few broken tubes and vials.

I went back to that conference room that Drake liked so much. This door was slightly ajar, so I stepped into the dimly lit room.

This room was unchanged. The prick was sitting right there at his table, as if nothing out of the ordinary was happening. There was only one other chair at the table, the one near my end that I had chosen before, in defiance of him.

"What the Hell is going on?"

He smiled, as usual and motioned for me to have a seat.

I sat down, but was ready to spring up in case things got nasty.

"My time here is over," he started, "and if you are wise, you will find that it is time for you to join me and end this charade."

"What do you mean?"

"Officer Smith," for the first time since I had died, he used my previous identity, "I have great plans for you, and others like you who choose to find immortality, who choose to become more than human!"

"What are you smoking? I didn't choose this...this existence. When you approached me for this damn project, I didn't think I even had a soul. I figured you were some weird quack with more money than brains. If I knew now, what I knew then, I would've never gotten mixed up with your crazy plans."

"But you do know better now, and yet you have chosen to stay. Why not leave, like you taught your friend to do?"

That brought me up short. I remained silent, staring into his vacant, black eyes.

"I think you remain here because you are afraid to move on. Even now, you doubt that you would be able to move on to that next phase. You fear death, as well you should!"

"I can you one thing, you bastard, I sure as Hell don't fear you anymore, and nothing you can say will make me join you in wherever it is you are and your cohorts are going. But, I will find you, wherever you go, and I will put an end to these fucking experiments you are conducting, if its the last thing I do!" With that I got up and was moving towards him. I had finally gathered up my resolve to extract a little revenge on his scrawny ass.

He smiled that bloodless smile of his, reached into his pocket and pulled out what looked like a small remote control device. He showed it to me with tantalizing slowness. I lunged towards his hand, not knowing what the heck that thing could do, only to find myself falling and unable to catch myself when he pressed one of the buttons on the device.

I lay on the floor, still able to hear and see what was going on, but unable to move even so much as a finger.

"Tsk, tsk," I heard in the ear that was pointed towards the ceiling, "you didn't think I would allow one of my creations to have the ability to bring me harm, do you? I know you can hear me and that you cannot respond. This device has totally paralyzed all of your movement functions, so you wil have to listen to what I have to say now.

"I know your type, boy. I have been around far longer than you can imagine. You have been useful. I have the evidence I need to show those who finance my work what can be done with the proper resources. It is time to begin the next phase of my work. I fear though that you will not be of further use to me. It is time for you to make your final journey beyond the veil. When I press this second button, the device that houses your spirit will dissolve and you will have no choice but to begin that journey you fear so much."

I tried again to move, but was unable to do so. I then shifted my attention to moving into the spirit world. I was feeling a lot pressure to do something though, so I was unable to immediately focus as I needed to.

"I can almost sense your struggle," he said, still close to my ear, "I can tell that you are not ready for that final passage. That is why you need me. With my help, you need not face that journey for a very long time. Join with me, you've seen what can be done. We have so much more to do and discover together.

"I will now active your speech center so tha tyou may respond to me. Will you join me, or must I discard you as I have the others before you who have failed me?"

I could 'feel' the speech center being activated. Still working on my concetration to move into the spirit world, I rasped out, "Never asshole. If you let me up, I'll send your ass on a journey!"

"Ah yes, that's what I thought you would say. Very well, you have given me everything I truly needed from you anyway..."

I interrupted him one last time, "I will hunt you down and finish you, you bastard!"

"I think not. Your time here and now is ended. I am sorry you've brought me to this point."

With that, he pressed the button that would have, should have, ended my second life, such as it is...

(continued tomorrow)