Stumblin' and Bumblin'

I have just returned from my first surveillance assignment. I have been told that this is the kind of assignment that I may expect to see lot of in the future. I must admit that I am very well suited to this kind of work right now.

In my prior life, surveillance was a drag. It comprises about 99% boredom, and 1% heartpounding excitement. It was always a struggle to stay awake long enough so as not to miss any important details. Of course now, I no longer have to worry about hunger, stiffening joints (they are always stiff-but at least I can’t feel it!), or feeling tired. Shit, I don’t even need to blink!

So last night I was assigned to sit and watch this house in a very bad urban neighborhood that is possibly connected to some serious drug dealing. I was made to look like a drunken stumblebum (not a very far stretch, if I do say so myself), and had to wear a natty old hat to cover my obviously fatal bullet hole scar in my forehead and some other tattered clothing to complete the outfit. I was then dropped off a couple of blocks down the street by an obviously distressed cabbie, who sped off like a bat-out-of-Hell when I loudly threw my empty 40 ounce bottle at him. I staggered down the street, mumbling and muttering in the kind of crazy, disjointed talk of many unfortunate street-dwellers, and made my way to just across the street from the target house. There I found a nice pile of abandoned furniture and garabge to strategically collapse into and feign unconsciousness.

I was out there all night and into this morning. I was amazed at the sheer variety of cars and customers that made their way to and then away from that house. They came from all over to this place, from suburban housewives driving their minivans, to sporty little cars driven by middle-aged businessman. Of course, there were plenty of jalopies and hoopdies mixed in there as well, and more than a few strung out addicts walking up to the place for their next fix.

A definite drug dealing location. There were always a couple of semi-obvious lookouts hanging out on various corners of the block, I was able to pick up on the signals they used to indicate potential customers or squad cars. There was also usually a pair of tough guys who would hang out near the door, playing cards and loud music, while barely concealed bulges gave away the locations of their guns.

Before, I prided myself on being a pretty observant cop, one who could pick out a likely perp from a croud of innocents better than the next guy, but I have never before been able to concentrate and observe the kinds of details I picked up on last night. I can literally remember the nicknames of the gangmembers as they greeted one another. I could also pick out many of the customers from a random lineup, and I even memorized the license plates and makes and models of most of the cars I saw. I have never been one to have a photographic memory before, but...this can be a curse as well. It is almost impossible for me to forget anything anymore, and there sure is an awful lot of shit I’d like to forget. You know the really sad thing,..I find I am remembering all sorts of shit I said and did in my prior life. Ain’t that a bitch? Now I get to recall all of the shitty things I said to my ex when we were heading towards divorce, and Hell, all of the things that I said and did before she gave up on my ass and took me to the cleaners. Of course that also means I get to relive all of the shit that was said to me, all the way back into friggin’ grade school. Ugh.

Sorry about that, I’m pretty sure you don’t want read about the nasty things I said to Sally Jensen in the thrid grade, or the things her bigger brother did to me in the boys’ room after that. I’ll try to stick to the story at hand, and try to bring some order to my musings. I just got overwhelmed for a second.

Back to the crack house surveillance. By this morning, one of the lookouts from the western end of the block passed by my body, and actually stopped to take anything of value I might have. I didn’t even stir as he rifled through my pockets taking the $3.89 I had placed in them before I had left the apartment. He kicked my lifeless body and cursed at my rather foul smell. He, or another of the lookouts, must have called in to dispatch about the dead body out front of their house, because they quickly packed in the rest of the scouts and the put up the card game, just before a couple of squad cars and an ambulance showed up. Luckily, the locals had been aware of the surveillance, and played it straight. They loaded me into a body bag, and threw me in the back of the coroner’s van when that arrived later. The bastards didn’t need to zip the damn bag up all the way though, I didn’t like that feeling of being in pitch darkness again, it reminded too much of my first death. As soon as I was safely in the van, and we were rolling away, I ripped that thing open and was figuratively breathed a sigh of relief.

I had to brief the locals in charge of the surveillance operation, and give them the list of license plates and vehicles to run through their systems. I also ran through a couple of photo arrays, and picked out 5 of the principles in the drug ring as being present in the operation.

I am not sure how much they can use my surveillance for court purposes however, since I am unlikely to be called to testify at any trial. One look at my ugly mug, and any defendant is gonna be set free by a jury. I don’t know how well this identity will hold up in a court of law either. I doubt that bastard Drake will allow me the chance to find out either.

In my next entry, I will endeavor to continue the story of how I came to be this way, and hopefully fill in a few more blanks. I am running short on time today, as this hunting and pecking away with two pencils is taking longer than I would like. I must go and rattle Drake’s cage to see if he can get me any more dexterity in these claw-like hands of mine. I can’t even hold a gun yet, and working any small device takes a great deal of time. I fear I am junking up this keyboard even now, and will need to replace it soon.